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Random Thoughts on Fantastic Four

The best thing that I can say about the Fantastic Four 2015 reboot is…that it was better than Green Lantern. That movie was traumatically horrid. Fantastic Four isn’t quite that bad, but it felt incomplete — as if the studio released a rough cut of the movie or an entire act was missing. It’s certainly not a good movie (superhero or otherwise), but I was surprised by how unfinished it felt. It doesn’t have a grand climax or a profound sense of resolution. Instead you’re left with a feeling of, “That’s it?” Whether it’s in a bedroom or in a movie theater, you don’t want that feeling.

In the grand RPadTV tradition, here’s a binary breakdown of the 2015 Fantastic Four movie.

Flaccid Four (Bad): Someone involved in the making of this superhero movie doesn’t like superhero movies. Fantastic Four lacks the standard superhero movie devices of epic battles, a stentorian soundtrack, and cool special effects. The movie’s finale was such a letdown. When the Fantastic Four finally fought Dr. Doom, the buildup was slow…and then suddenly the fight was over. Whether it was the director, the editor, or the studio, the people involved with this movie took the Fantastic Four and made them a fantastic bore.

Dr. Doom (Bad): Why, why, why can’t a movie portray Dr. Doom properly?!? It’s confounding. He’s one of the best villains in the Marvel Universe! Comics Doom is an awesome combination of science and sorcery. While much of the world fears him, the people that he rules love him. Many of his actions are driven by mommy issues (i.e. love). He’s arrogant and capable, with just enough vulnerability to make him sympathetic. In the last two Fantastic Four movies, Doom was an evil businessman. In this one, he’s an angry tech geek. In all three films, he lacked the confidence, competence, and heart that make Doom such a brilliant character in the comics.

Kate Mara (Good): On the plus side, Kate Mara was the best part of the movie (visually). She wasn’t great as Sue Storm/The Invisible Woman, but she did an adequate job and will satisfy those that felt Jessica Alba was too dopey in the last two Fantastic Four movies. I am, of course, biased when it comes to Kate Mara. She’s alluring and she comes from a wealthy family. It’s fun watching her on a big screen while you dream about her making you a kept man.

Michael B. Jordan (Bad): When Jordan was announced as Johnny Storm/The Human Torch, some fans were livid that an African-American actor was cast as a white-bread character. What they should really be mad about is that he completely sucked in the movie. Jordan was easily the worst lead in the Fantastic Four. While the rest of the cast did a reasonable job of movie-level acting, Jordan brought his WB-level game to the film. He was so bad that I have high hopes of him replacing Paul Walker as my favorite crappy actor. If Jordan adds a bit of charm to his inept acting then he has a good chance of getting there.

Franklin Storm Rocked (Good): The best actor in the movie wasn’t one of the four main protagonists or the sole villain. He was a supporting character — Reg E. Cathey’s Dr. Franklin Storm. His performance was easily the best in the movie — dude has a wicked voice that adds gravitas to his scenes.

Oyster Bay Why?!? (Bad): For reasons that seem random, the movie’s version of Reed Richards and Benjamin Grimm grew up in Oyster Bay. My personal problem with this is that there’s a cutaway scene in Oyster Bay where the Manhattan skyline is shown. I lived in Oyster Bay for a few years. Unless you have a really tall house and a very powerful telescope, you cannot see Manhattan from Oyster Bay. The scene reminded me of Jackie Chan’s Rumble in the Bronx, when a cutaway of the Statue of Liberty was shown. Similar to how you can’t see the Statue of Liberty from the Bronx, you simply can’t see Manhattan from Oyster Bay.

The bigger issue pertains to Ben Grimm’s character. In the comics, he grew up on the Lower East Side on Yancy Street. His older brother was killed in a gang fight. Grimm’s rough big-city upbringing is a huge part of his identity and The Thing’s rocky exterior is a metaphor for his tough shell that covers a soft heart. Going deeper, comics Thing has several personal elements from his creator, Jack Kirby. “The King” grew up on the Lower East Side on Delancey Street and had an older brother that died when he was young. The movie’s change in locales makes no sense geographically and is insulting to the character’s creator.

Not the Least Bit Fantastic: Honestly, Fantastic Four isn’t as bad as some people are making it out to be. It felt like it was a little more than halfway to being a decent superhero movie. Whether it was the directing, editing, or studio meddling, something went terribly wrong and the end product was poor. Again, it’s not nearly as wretched as Green Lantern (an admittedly low bar) and has a few moments that were superior to anything from the last two FF films. At the end of the day, Fox bungled Marvel’s first family of superheroes. The movie definitely isn’t worth seeing in theaters and certainly not worthy of a Blu-ray purchase. When it gets in cable rotation then perhaps you can justify watching it out of curiosity, but there are better superhero films to spend your time with.

Deadpool Red Band Trailer is Awesome!!!

While it doesn’t contain everything shown at Comic Con 2015, the Deadpool red band trailer is still pretty awesome. The silly humor and ridiculous violence that make the comics so much fun appear to be present in the movie. Of course the action and quips are fantastic, but I really enjoyed Deadpool’s interactions with Weasel. I’m a fan of the character and TJ Miller usually makes me laugh. My only disappointment with the Deadpool red band trailer is that the Negasonic Teenage Warhead joke was cut.

Anyway, check out the clip when you have a chance. While Ryan Reynold’s is partially responsible for the most traumatic superhero movie that I’ve ever seen, I’m cautiously excited for Deadpool. Reynolds seems to have the character’s tone down perfectly and the ludicrous violence is as it should be. What do you guys and dolls think? Does the Deadpool red band trailer give you high hopes for the movie? Or is the stench of Green Lantern still too fresh?

The Best Shia LaBeouf “Do It!!!” Videos

I’ve discovered that the cure to fluctuating between depression and ennui is watching Shia LaBeouf “Do It!!!” videos. The original motivational speech was entertaining on its own, but when you add it to various scenes in movies and television, it becomes pure gold. The following are a bunch of my favorite Shia LaBeouf “Do It!!!” juxtapositions.

Let’s start with this unforgettable scene from Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back. Shia LaBeouf’s motivational skills make Yoda’s look pedestrian.

Next up is Goku building up a “spirit bomb” to take down Frieza in Dragon Ball Z. Forget a power level that’s over 9,000. With Shia LaBeouf in your corner, your power level will easily exceed 9,000,000.

Even the King of Pop needed help back in his day. Forget “Beat It.” It’s all about “Do It!!!”

While Harry Potter achieved ordinary wizarding levels (OWLs) on his own, Shia LaBeouf helped The Boy Who Lived take it to next level in this epic showdown. I don’t know that Potter could’ve taken down Lord Voldemort in The Goblet of Fire without the extra motivation.

Shia LaBeouf can also help when grisly acts are required, as seen in Rorschach’s grand finale in The Watchmen.

Last, but not least, Shia LaBeouf has chosen a side in the conflict between Batman and Superman.

Random Thoughts on Avengers Age of Ultron

Avengers Age of Ultron is sure to delight most fans of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The movie has everything that made the first Avengers movie incredibly popular — fantastic special effects, awesome action sequences, and snappy Joss Whedon dialogue. As a lifelong comics nerd, my usual pet peeve with comic book movies is deviating greatly from the source material. To my surprise, I really liked the major changes made for the movie.

While I greatly enjoyed Avengers Age of Ultron and will definitely see it in theaters again, there were a few things about it that bugged me. Below is the customary RPadTV binary breakdown of the film. As always, I’d love to hear what you have to say about the movie, so after you’ve seen it, kindly share your thoughts in the comments section. Now turn on your spoiler shields and let’s get avenging!

Ultron Owns (Good): I’m a big fan of the comics version of Ultron. Since the movie version is very different, I was worried about this incarnation of the robotic bad-ass. The original was created by Hank Pym (Ant-Man, Goliath, Yellow Jacket, etc.) and based on his brain patterns. The movie version was created by Tony Stark and based on his personality. That made for a highly entertaining baddie. Whereas comics Ultron is a megalomaniac that’s hellbent on wiping out organic life, the movie version is like a warped version of Tony Stark with the “sardonic dick” dial turned to 11. Like the original, movie Ultron is powerful, ruthless, and brilliant. Unlike the original, movie Ultron is hilarious and witty. Despite the fact that movie Ultron wants to destroy humanity, you kind of want to have a drink with him (yes, I know he can’t actually enjoy liquor, but still….).

Some of the early reviews of Avengers Age of Ultron criticized the movie’s villain, saying that Ultron wasn’t nearly as good as Tom Hiddleston’s Loki. I could not disagree more. Even though he was very different from the comics version, I thoroughly enjoyed the Ultron character. James Spader had fun material to work with and he rocked it.

Incredible Action (Good): This aspect of Avengers Age of Ultron was completely expected, but enjoyable nonetheless. I loved the blend of CG special effects and melee choreography. The effects — there are just so many cool ones to choose from. As for combat, there were a few Captain America scenes that made me utter a Keanu Reeves, “Whoa.”

Black Widow and Hulk (Bad): While the first Avengers movie was very Iron Man heavy, Avengers Age of Ultron was far more of an ensemble effort. The movie gave more characters time to shine than the original did. Unfortunately, it also gave us plot lines like the romance between Black Widow and Hulk. This bit did absolutely nothing for me. It felt forced and unnatural; going into the movie, I couldn’t imagine these characters having a romantic relationship and the actors/script did nothing to change that. This plot was a waste of time — a poor excuse to give Scarlett Johansson more screen time.

Hawkeye Surprises (Good): To my surprise, Hawkeye had a lot of screen time and great material to work with. As one of the “normal” humans on the team, Hawkeye’s mortality and fragility help make him more interesting and easier to identify with. I enjoyed how Avengers Age of Ultron played on the fact that he’s just a guy with a bow that’s hanging out with Norse gods, gamma irradiated powerhouses, and dude’s with billion-dollar self-defense suits. Showing that Hawkeye has a normal family life in addition to his insane Avengers life, was a fun touch.

Captain America’s Mighty Magnets (Bad): I hated Cap’s magnetized gauntlets, even though they make his unbelievable shield-throwing somewhat more believable. This is a total fanboy complain and I’m well aware of this, but I love Cap’s ability to ricochet his shield at impossible angles, hitting multiple targets, always having it return to his arm. While magnetized gauntlets that help the shield return to his arm makes sense, I preferred Cap’s shield-throwing being one of his inexplicable abilities.

Whedon Witticisms (Good and Bad): Some of the early reviews of Avengers Age of Ultron said that Whedon’s dialogue seems tired and dated. I respect that opinion, but disagree with it. As a fan of dense and witty dialogue, I very much enjoyed the movie’s script. While some called the snappy dialogue tired, I found it familiar and entertaining.

Quicksilver (Bad): Seconds after Quicksilver was introduced I thought, “Wow. Kick-Ass got a crappy costume and an even crappier accent.” Although I enjoyed how Quicksilver’s storyline ended in Avengers Age of Ultron, I thought he was mostly lame until his resolution.

Scarlett Witch (Good): Sure, the movie version of Scarlett Witch basically had Phoenix’s powers — a combination of telepathic and telekinetic abilities. Given how vague and ridiculous her “hex” powers in the comics are, I understand the change, even though her powers were awfully convenient in several scenes. All that said, Elizabeth “Lizzie” Chase Olsen is beautiful and I’ve been ready for ascent for nearly two years. She made the Scarlett Witch how in Avengers Age of Ultron.

Vision (Good): I enjoyed the movie version of Vision. He was cool, calm, and collected character. His power’s special effects were fun to see. Vision had one of the most enjoyable “Wow!” moments of the movie when he handed Thor his hammer. A more subtle moment (that totally got me) was when he checked out Thor’s cape, admired it, and grew himself a cape. Out of all the new heroes introduced in Avengers Age of Ultron, Vision was my favorite. I’ve enjoyed Paul Bettany’s acting and the character’s special effects were slick.

Bottom Line: Aside from the banal and insipid romance between Black Widow and Hulk, I only had minor complaints about Avengers Age of Ultron. I very much enjoyed the movie, will see it again in theaters, and watch it dozens of times after it’s available digitally. It has everything I want from a summer movie — great action, snappy dialogue, and fantastic special effects. While I understand why some people won’t enjoy Avengers Age of Ultron, I think those people enjoy killing fun. If you’re any kind of comics nerd, go see this movie now!

For another take on Avengers Age of Ultron, check out the PaulSemel.com review.

Better Than Batman vs. Superman Trailer (Dawn of Justice)

As some of you know from the RPadTV Google Hangout, I wasn’t a fan of the recently released Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice trailer. It did absolutely nothing for me. It didn’t show me anything new (control your photo leaks, Warners!) and it didn’t get me more excited for the movie. It was two minutes of banality. Thankfully, the crews from How it Should Have Ended and Screen Junkies have whipped up videos that are far more entertaining. Continue reading “Better Than Batman vs. Superman Trailer (Dawn of Justice)”

Coffee Talk #652: Random Thoughts on Daredevil (Netflix)

After a trio of binge-watching sessions, I finally got around to finishing Daredevil on Netflix. The first of several direct-to-Netflix series of the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU), all 13 episodes of Daredevil were released on the streaming service on April 10, 2015. A few of you RPadholics and many of my friends binge-watched the show over the release weekend, but I spaced out my viewing sessions (partially to savor it and partially due to other commitments). After finishing Daredevil and thinking about it for a day, I’ve come to the conclusion that I really, really enjoyed the series, but absolutely love what it does for the MCU. I’ll break down my likes and dislikes below, but first a bit on why I love what Daredevil means for the future of the MCU.

As I mentioned, Daredevil is the first of several Marvel series coming to Netflix. For various reasons, the company chose Netflix to highlight its “street level” superheroes. Following Daredevil, Netflix will have shows starring Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, and Iron First. While the Avengers combat alien invasions, Captain America battles giant Nazi organizations, and Thor faces off against demigods, the street level heroes fight everyday crime. Daredevil beats on muggers, Luke Cage fights gangs, Jessica Jones has a private investigation firm, and Iron First has girly yellow slippers. I love that this facet of Marvel is being explored. While these heroes aren’t as powerful as a Norse god or a man in billion-dollar armor, they’re easier to relate to and arguably more interesting because of their vulnerabilities. The street level heroes are a brilliant contrast to the Avengers and help diversify the MCU.

I also love that all 13 episodes were released at once on Netflix. Yeah, you don’t have the weekly water-cooler chats about the show, but I love that I can watch as much Daredevil as I please whenever I please. People love to binge-watch these days and being able to binge-watch a brand new show is very, very cool.

Now let’s move on to some random thoughts (binary style!) about Daredevil. I know that many of you have finished the show already and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it. Please share them in the comments section. Now activating binary mode. (Activate your spoiler shields!)

Good: I’m sure some parents’ and/or Christian groups will be appalled that I’m celebrating Daredevil’s violence, but that aspect of the show was unique compared to the violence in the MCU movies. Sure, Cap, Thor, and the gang take their fair share of punches, but the violence in Daredevil is far more bone-crunching. There are several episodes where you think the hero’s powers aren’t enhanced senses, but the ability to absorb a decade’s worth of ass-kicking in 30 minutes or less. Daredevil takes several beatings throughout the 13 episodes and unlike a Norse god getting smacked by a frost giant, you can imagine what those beatings were like.

Daredevil gives as good as he gets too (otherwise, he’d be dead after two episodes). The beatings Daredevil doles out are straight-up nasty and Kingpin’s use of a car door makes me a little bit scared of my Ford Focus Electric. Appropriately, the street level heroes face street level violence.

Bad: Television shows have a certain rhythm, usually planned around commercial breaks. Since direct-to-Netflix shows don’t have such annoyances, the directors are liberated. In some cases, the unusual pacing can be pleasantly surprising. In others, there are dull stretches. While I liked Daredevil’s lack of predictable beats, there were several episodes that could have been better with more traditional pacing. Sometimes giving directors and editors freedom isn’t the best.

Good: Kingpin absolutely ruled. Between Vincent D’Onofrio’s performance and the material he had to work with, this version of Kingpin is my favorite live-action portrayal of a comic-book villain ever. I’ve never watched a villain so nuanced and layered. D’Onofrio’s Kingpin was powerful, gentle, ruthless, caring, maniacal, child like, romantic, and sadistic. Sure, he had 13 episodes to develop the character, but his performance was flat-out impressive no matter how you slice it. It’s awesome how you can find be terrified of Kingpin in one scene and feel sorry him in a scene where he’s on an awkward date.

Bad: While Kingpin owned and the supporting cast was strong, I found Charlie Cox a little bland. In the comics, I enjoy reading as much about Matt Murdock as I do his alter ego. In the show, I couldn’t wait for Murdock to put on his costume and kick some ass. Part of it has to do with Cox’s stupid grin, which is just asking to be smacked. It’s not that he was bad; I just found the rest of the cast more entertaining.

Good: As I mentioned in the last paragraph, the supporting cast was strong. My favorite episode was probably the seventh, which featured Daredevil’s trainer Stick. I love this character in the comics and was thrilled to see him on television. Scott Glenn’s interpretation of stick was lots of fun.

A close second was the tenth episode, “Nelson vs. Murdock.” In the previous episodes, I enjoyed Elden Henson’s version of Foggy Nelson, but he killed it in this one. It would have been easy and lazy to rely on Foggy purely as comic relief. Having him challenge Matt — questioning his existence as Daredevil and their decades-long friendship — made for a powerful episode.

Good: There were lots of cute nods to fans of the comics. I loved the crack about Vanessa dating a guy that wore white suits with purple cravats (Kingpin’s traditional outfit in the comics). Mentions of the Greek girl Matt dated in college set the ground for a future appearance by Elektra. While Karen Page was victimized throughout the series, the use of heroin in the show made me worry that the writers will follow the books and make her an addict in the future. While they were forgettable asides for people new to Daredevil, they were also nice bits for longtime fans of the character to hear.

Bad: As expected, Daredevil took a few episodes to come together. The first few episodes ranged from decent to good. It wasn’t until the fifth episode that Daredevil really took off.

Good: Rosario Dawson is amazingly sexy.

Bad: Poor Ben Urich. I was hoping to see him in the upcoming Spider-Man reboot, but his MCU version is no more. (Note to RPadholic Smartguy: Why aren’t you complaining about Daredevil Ben Urich being black?!? :p)

Good: I loved the way that the first season ended. Ultimately, it was about Wilson Fisk throwing away his altruistic (though misguided) side and truly becoming the Kingpin, just as much as it was about Matt Murdock finding his way (and an honest tailor) and fully becoming Daredevil. It was a great build that left me wanting more. On a side note, I’ve always wondered why other superheroes never messed with Daredevil on April 1, replacing his red costume with a turquoise and fuchsia getup…but perhaps that’s just me.

Good: While I wouldn’t go as far as saying that Daredevil is the best part of the MCU (which some others have proclaimed), I very much enjoyed the show and love that it laid the groundwork for future street level exploits. Bring on ~~Jewel~~ Jessica Jones!

New Fantastic Four Trailer is Surprisingly Cool

I know that many of you are down on the upcoming Fantastic Four reboot, but the latest trailer just might get you interested. It’s very cool — surprisingly so. The tone seems correct, the special effects look great, Kate Mara (the sugar mama of my dreams) is hot, and Dr. Doom looks bad-ass. Yes, it’s only a trailer and Fox has botched this franchise before, but the latest Fantastic Four trailer has me slightly hopeful.

For me, the movie hinges on Dr. Doom. I absolutely hated how he was portrayed in the previous movies. Dr. Doom is absolutely not an evil businessman, as played by Julian McMahon. The comics have him as a really unique mix of science and sorcery (and mommy issues). Even though the trailer was better than I was expecting, I was dismayed to find out that the upcoming Dr. Doom is Victor Domashev, an evil programmer, rather than Victor Von Doom, the megalomaniacal scientist/sorcerer we’ve known and loved for decades.

That said, my expectations for the upcoming Fantastic Four movie were so low that the new trailer was a pleasant surprise. Perhaps that’s the best way to approach the movie — expect mediocrity (or worse) and be happy if the movie is above average (or better). Yeah…that’s probably the way to go.

If you missed the first trailer, give it a look here. After you’ve watched the new trailer, kindly share your thoughts on it in the comments section. Are you hopeful that the third time will be a charm for the Fantastic Four? Or do you think it’ll be another hot mess from Fox?

Olivia Munn Cast as Psylocke: Worst News of 2015

RPadholic Tokz was kind enough tell me that Olivia Munn has been cast as Psylocke in the upcoming X-Men: Apocalypse movie. Director Bryan Singer made the announcement on an Instagram post. As a fan of the Marvel Comics character and someone that thinks Olivia Munn is dreadful on multiple levels, this is the worst news I’ve heard all year.

For those of you unfamiliar with the character, Psylocke was born a British mutant and later possessed the body of a Japanese assassin. Her most popular and longest lasting incarnation portrays her as a mashup of the two. She has the British upbringing, psychic powers, and kick-ass ninja skills. Yeah, it doesn’t make sense, but neither does Olivia Munn getting cast in a major comic-book movie (half-kidding). On the plus side, Psylocke gets around and has had dalliances with several Marvel superheroes, so maybe casting a trollop like Munn was an inspired choice (again, half-kidding).

While I admit (rather painfully) that Munn was good in The Newsroom and I begrudgingly enjoyed her performances, I’ve pretty much hated everything else she’s done (in life). Psylocke is arguably the coolest female X-Men member of all time. She kicks ass, physically and mentally. She wears a uniform that’s completely inappropriate for combat, but easy on the eyes. Her psychic daggers are immensely wicked. Her backstory is so ridiculous that it became ironically entertaining. And there’s something funny about a strong and powerful woman named…(wait for it) Betsy. While a few of you RPadholics mentioned me boycotting X-Men: Apocalypse, I just can’t do it. As terrible as Olivia Munn is as a person, I’m too much of a nerd to not see an X-Men movie.

On the plus side, the movie is full of beautiful women that aren’t dreadful people (afaik). Hopefully the likes of Sophie Turner, Rose Byrne, Fan Bingbing, and Jennifer Lawrence will counteract the awfulness of Olivia Munn playing Psylocke.

Of course, this post is just one man’s opinion. I’d love to hear your thoughts on (the terrible) Olivia Munn playing (the awesome) Psylocke in X-Men Apocalypse. Kindly share your feelings (like a Care Bear) in the comments section.

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Fantastic Four Trailer Is….

A trailer for the upcoming Fantastic Four movie has landed and it’s way different from what I was expecting. The tone is somber and serious, giving the movie a more dramatic feel than your typical summer-superhero fare. That’s not a bad thing at all and, of course, the trailer only shows one aspect of the movie. Having said that, as a longtime FF reader and someone that enjoyed moments of the previous Fantastic Four movies, the trailer didn’t have the tone that I wanted. When I think about the Fantastic Four, I think of Marvel’s foremost superhero family. Yeah, they have cool powers due to an irresponsible experiment with cosmic rays and they go on amazing adventures, but the dynamic between Reed, Sue, Ben, and Johnny is what “makes” the book for me.

Also, the trailer needed about 900 percent more Kate-Mara-in-skimpy-clothing clips.

Seriously though, Marvel superhero movies have generally been more “fun” than DC’s more serious films. While I’m sure that the Fantastic Four movie will have comedic moments and sweet CG-powered fight scenes, the trailer is making me prepare for a more serious side of Marvel’s filmic efforts.

What do you guys and dolls think of the trailer and its feel? Kindly share your thoughts in the comments section.

Guardians of the Galaxy Meets…Friends?!?

What do you get when you mashup the smash movie hit Guardians of the Galaxy and the smash television hit Friends? The answer is…a shockingly entertaining video that makes a lot of sense. Think about it for a minute. The witty and sarcastic Peter Quill makes total sense as Chandler Bing. The slow and loyal Drax the Destroyer is perfect as Joey Tribbiani (when you add green skin pigmentation and years of human growth hormone abuse). Since there’s only one lady in the Guardians lineup, I guess Gamora has to be Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe.

Anyway, check out the clip below and let me know what you think of this funky mashup of Guardians of the Galaxy and Friends. In case you missed it, here’s my review of the movie.