(Not a) Review of Dante’s Inferno: An Animated Epic

I attended a screening of Dante’s Inferno: An Animated Epic on Tueday. It was full of ultra-violence, disturbing imagery, cool animation, and vagina-shaped thingies. As a standalone animated film, it was okay. As an animated film that promotes a game, it totally succeeded in making me want to play Dante’s Inferno. Here are some assorted thoughts (not a review!) on the movie.

In the first few seconds, I was impressed with the animation style and was expecting something fairly realistic. The first three minutes of the film shattered all of my expectations. It went something like this:

  • Minute One: Dante’s horse flies upside down. For a second I thought he was attempting to do M. Bison’s “psycho crusher” from Street Fighter.
  • Minute Two: Dante returns home to find the slaughtered remains of his family and servants. This was just a taste of the gore that was about to come.
  • Minute Three: The spirit of Dante’s beloved Beatrice Portinari goes full frontal. This was just a taste of the boobs and vaginae that were were about to come.

So yeah! The animation style was impressive and disturbing in that tentacle-porn way. Compared to Planet Hulk, an animated film I recently saw, the art style and technique were out of this world. That said, some people might not like that several different animation studios with distinct art styles contributed to this movie. One of my friends in atendance didn’t like how disjointed and inconsistent everything was. In some scenes, Dante was thin and had long hair. In other scenes he was buff and had short hair. His appearance during the flashbacks reflected whatever style a particular animation house was using.

Perhaps I’m giving the film too much credit, but I chalked it up to journeying through a spiritual realm and perception changing in the various Circles of Hell. Hmmm, after typing that thought, I’m definitely giving the film too much credit.

Oh yeah, the Nine Circles of Hell hurts and works for this movie. Starting in the real world, traveling through the Nine Circles, and having flashbacks is a lot to do in an 88-minute movie. It definitely feels rushed and sometimes forced. Death’s Scythe — one of Dante’s two major weapons — isn’t explained at all; it seems like it’s just a random object Dante finds early in the movie and keeps for the next 84 minutes. Virgil’s introduction is done in like 15 seconds, “Hey, I’m Virgil! You loved my poetry and I’ll be your guide. Try the veal!” The way it does work is that it teases each circle as a level. It made me want to see more of each level and all of the boss fights.

The violence in the movie is completely over-the-top and it can be lots of fun. Some of the fight scenes were awesome, but by the end of the film I had my fill. The impact of Dante’s showdown with Lucifer was lost on me because my brain couldn’t process any more violence. If crazy fight scenes are your thing then you’ll love this flick. It makes Kill Bill look like Bambi.

There are some people — a certain game designer with a masters in English that’s working on BioShock 2 comes to mind — that will be offended by the movie’s liberties. Sure, a lot of details were altered, but the movie (and presumably the game) had far more accuracies than I was expecting. If it gets people interested in The Divine Comedy and leads to gamers reading the books, that’s just a fantastic thing. Besides, if you were expecting a literal translation in this movie or the game then you’re just stupid.

Dante’s Inferno: An Animated Epic comes out on February 9, 2010 — the same week as the game. This is a mistake. It should be out now to generate more interest in the game. As a marketing tool, it excels at making people want to play on PS3 and Xbox 360. Few people are going to want to buy it after playing. It entertained me, but it’s hard to recommend it as a Blu-ray or DVD purchase. I do think it would be an excellent impulse download on PSN or Xbox Live, so long as you’re expecting tons of gratuitous violence, gallons of blood, and vagina walls.

Upcoming Xbox Live Marketplace Goodies

Microsoft marketing tool Major Nelson has posted a bunch of upcoming Xbox Live Marketplace goodies that are hitting the service between now and early February. Check ’em out:

Xbox Live Deal of the Week:
Feb. 1: Splosion Man, 400 Microsoft Points

Xbox Live Games on Demand:
Jan. 26: Dead Rising and Halo Wars
Feb. 2: Medal of Honor: Airborne

Xbox Live Arcade:
Jan. 27: KrissX, 800 Microsoft Points
Feb. 3: Chime, 400 Microsoft Points

Xbox Avatars Marketplace:
Jan. 28: Assassin’s Creed
Feb. 4 : Valentine’s Day and Carnival collections

Game Add-Ons:
Jan. 27: Pinball FX Excalibur Table, 240 Microsoft Points
Jan. 28: Assassin’s Creed II: Battle of Forli, 320 Microsoft Points
Feb. 2: Halo 3 Mythic 2 Map Pack, 800 Microsoft Points

Anything on the list interest you?

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Portal: Still Alive is the Xbox Live Deal of the Week

Microsoft’s Xbox Live Deal of the Week is Portal: Still Alive for 800 Microsoft Points. Originally part of The Orange Box, Portal received a ton of critical hype and all of it was deserved. Blending puzzles, action, and great storytelling, Portal wasn’t what I was expecting at all (and I mean that in the best way possible). If you haven’t played this game, I highly recommend it. It’s unique, fresh, and inventive — just an amazing experience.

The good news is that it’s on sale for $10. The bad news is that it might be a better deal to just buy The Orange Box for less than $20.

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This Week’s Videogame Releases

It’s not big week in terms of the number of games coming out, but it’s frickin’ huge for enthusiast gamers! On Xbox 360 there’s BioWare’s Mass Effect 2, which a bunch of you were looking forward to. The PlayStation 3 has MAG, if you’re interested in getting your multiplayer groove on in mind-shattering numbers. Wii fans have Tatsunoko VS. Capcom: Ultimate All-Stars and No More Heroes 2 to look forward to. As for the handheld systems? I didn’t notice anything worth mentioning or making fun of.

Are you buying any of these games this week? (If so, feel free to use those handy Amazon links above! *wink* *wink* *nudge* *nudge*)

Final Fantasy XIII Special Edition Details

UK retailer Play has revealed details on the Final Fantasy XIII special edition. (Be sure to hit the break for a photo of all the goodies!) The limited edition package will include:

  • Special fliptop packaging
  • Final Fantasy XIII Original Sound Selection — Soundtrack CD including a selection of music tracks from the game that are especially chosen for this Limited Collector’s Edition by composer Masashi Hamauzu. The CD is presented inside a slipcase featuring artwork from Final Fantasy XIII, and also liner notes that are written by the composer.
  • ‘The World of Final Fantasy XIII‘ — Hardback book featuring character artwork, CG rendered artwork and environments from across the game production.
  • Exclusive Art Prints — 3 highly collectable art prints showing artwork of the Eidolons, powerful summoned allies of the lead playable characters in Final Fantasy XIII.
  • Unique ‘Brand of the l’Cie’ decal — Collectable decal featuring this most iconic symbol from the game storyline.

Remember, this is for the PAL version of the game. The North American version could be different.

For those of you buying the game, are you going to buy the special edition or go plain vanilla?

Source via OXCGN

Today’s Poll: Which Motion Controller Will You Buy in 2010?

It’s going to a potentially big year for motion controls on consoles. The Wii has done filthy numbers, largely thanks to the unique experience it offers through motion. Microsoft is getting in the game with Project Natal, while Sony plans to do the same with PlayStation Arc. It might be too soon to tell, but I wanted to see if any of you were planning on picking up any or all of these motion controllers. Let the polling begin!

[poll id=”20″]

Reminder: Vandal Hearts Coming to PSN and Xbox Live

I usually hate using an entire blog post to talk about one game being released, but I wanted to make sure everyone knew that Vandal Hearts: Flames of Judgement will be available tomorrow through PlayStation Network and Xbox Live. A prequel to the original game (for PlayStation and Saturn), this delightful tactical RPG will appeal to fans of Final Fantasy Tactics and Disgaea. I absolutely love this genre, so I’m thrilled whenever a new release is available.

Anyone else hyped for this game? Or is it just me?

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NPD Console Sales Figures Top 10 Games of December 2009

NPD Group has released its console software sales information for December 2009. What were the big holiday games? Let’s find out!

  1. New Super Mario Bros. Wii (Wii): 2,820,000
  2. Wii Fit Plus (Wii): 2,410,000
  3. Wii Sports Resort (Wii): 1,790,000
  4. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 (Xbox 360): 1,630,000
  5. Call of Duty: Moden Warfare 2 (PlayStation 3): 1,120,000
  6. Wii Play (Wii): 1,010,000
  7. Mario Kart Wii (Wii): 936,1000
  8. Assassin’s Creed II (Xbox 3600: 783,100
  9. Left 4 Dead 2 (Xbox 360): 728,500
  10. Mario & Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story (Nintendo DS): 656,700

As my favorite Irish bartender in New York would say, “Jaysus Christ!” I know a lot of you are Nintendo haters, but look at those numbers. Wouldn’t you love to have stock in the company?!? Ridiculous.

In other news, Activision continued its success with Modern Warfare 2 and Ubi posted some nice numbers with Assassin’s Creed II. Still, it’s hard to look at the list and not be floored by Nintendo’s performance.

Now kindly chanel your inner Michael Pachter and analyze this (please)!

NPD Hardware Sales Figures for December 2009

NPD Group has issued its console hardware sales data for December 2009. Capping off the year and the extremely lucrative holiday-shopping season, this is an extremely vital sales period. Let’s see how Nintendo, Microsoft, and Sony performed.

  • Wii: 3,810,000
  • Nintendo DS: 3,310,000
  • PlayStation 3: 1,360,000
  • Xbox 360: 1,310,000
  • PlayStation Portable: 654,700
  • PlayStation 2: 333,200

Okay, tell me again how the Nintendo Wii is a fad? It has been whomping the competition for years and posted ridiculous numbers in December. Microsoft and Sony would kill for these “fad” numbers. As for those guys, both companies did well in December and should be proud of the numbers. In the pointless fanboy argument, the difference wasn’t really notable. Sony will have to hustle in 2010 to close the gap between the PS3 and Xbox 360.

What do you think of NPD’s December 2009 console sales figures? Any surprises? Any predictions for the new year?

Razer USA President Robert Krakoff Talks Xbox 360 Controllers

One of the leading companies in competitive PC gaming products, Razer recently announced that it was entering the console market with a pair of Xbox 360 peripherals. I recently chatted with Razer USA president Robert “Razerguy” Krakoff to discuss the Onza controller and Chimaera headset. In addition to detailed features on these products, Krakoff told me why Razer decided to enter the console space and discussed the company’s plans for other consoles. Check it out!

(Huge thanks to N8R for putting this together!)