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Coffee Talk #601: Your WrestleMania Dream Match

Looking at the current WWE roster, I was wondering what WrestleMania dream match is floating around in your head. It doesn’t necessarily have to be for WrestleMania XXX in New Orleans. Any WrestleMania in the near future works for this fun game. Do you want to see a clash of giants? How about two masters of technical wrestling going at it? Perhaps you fancy a David-and-Goliath showdown. Whatever your WrestleMania dream match is, I’d love to hear about it. As for me, the answer is easy. I want to see…continued

Welcome to Coffee Talk! Let’s start off the day by discussing whatever is on your (nerd chic) mind. Every morning I’ll kick off a discussion and I’m counting on you to participate in it. If you’re not feelin’ my topic, feel free to start a chat with your fellow readers and see where it takes you. Whether you’re talking about videogames, the Miley Cyrus media blitz, spending an hour researching the life and times of Kevin Sorbo, or Scarlett Johansson looking perfect without makeup, Coffee Talk is the place to do it.

I’m a big, big fan of these two guys, going back to their Ring of Honor days as Bryan Danielson and Claudio Castagnoli. I’ve seen them have amazing matches together and I’d love to see them have an all-time great match at WrestleMania. They’re both wonderfully talented pro-wrestlers with diverse arsenals. Both are technically proficient, but have skills that complement each other. Danielson has the edge in high-flying maneuvers, while Claudio can pull off some power moves that few others would even think about trying. For a taste of how awesome a WrestleMania dream match between Daniel Bryan and Antonio Cesaro would be, check out this 2008 Ring of Honor clip below.

If you didn’t think that match was fantastic then I hope someone gives you a Ricola Bomb followed by Cattle Mutilation.

Sadly, it looks like this WrestleMania dream match is a few years away. While Danielson has been main-eventing WWE cards for some time, Claudio is being held back by Jack Swagger and Dutch Mantel as part of the “Real Americans” group. Hopefully he gets a chance to break out as a singles wrestler soon. He certainly has the ability. He just needs another opportunity. When that happens, I hope (but doubt) WWE creative brings back the, “Heyyyyyyyy!!!” gimmick. I miss that.

Anyway, what’s your WrestleMania dream match? Be the booker-man in the comments section (please!).

Watch Antonio Cesaro Giant-Swing The Great Khali…Twice!

Claudio Castagnoli, known as Antonio Cesaro in WWE, has been one of my favorite pro-wrestlers of the last decade. He has an incredible combination of power, technical wrestling skills, and dynamic moves. While his “Very” European uppercuts are wicked to watch, WWE fans have been marveling at Antonio Cesaro’s “giant swing” move. Check out the two clips below of Antonio Cesaro executing the maneuver on the gargantuan Great Khali. The first is from the WWE Battleground pay-per-view event on Sunday and the second is from last night’s Monday Night Raw. They’re just amazing displays of strength…and my back hurts just watching Antonio Cesaro do the move on YouTube. After you’ve checked out the clip, let me know who you’d like to see as a future victim of the Cesaro Swing. The Big Show? Mark Henry? Vickie Guerrero?

(On a side note, I love how Michael Cole accidentally called Hornswaggle by his real name, Dylan, in the second clip. Sadly, WWE edited that part out.)

PaulSemel.com Babe Interviews: Melissa Joan Hart, Pauley Perrette

RPad.TV ally PaulSemel.com has posted a pair of interviews that you should definitely check out. First up is a vintage conversation with Melissa Joan Hart, who is famous for…you know, I’m not really sure what she does or did. I think she was on a sitcom when she was a teenager and did some Lindsay Lohan-type stuff back in the day. What I do know, is the she was a celebrity at a Sega Dreamcast event I went to back in the late ’90s and people are still talking about her, so she must be doing something right.

Paul also interviewed the super-cool Pauley Perrette, one of the stars of NCIS. The first part of a PaulSemel.com exclusive, this is a great interview that touches a wide variety of subjects. Pauley is an interesting person and Paul is a fine interviewer that developed keen investigatory journalism skills from his days working at Gene Simmmons’ Tongue magazine. That formidable combination made for an entertaining interview. Please check it out!

Pokemon Origins Trailer

Pokemon Origins is a four-part animated series that tells the old-school story of Pokemon Red/Blue. While many fans of the Pokemon cartoons known and love Ash Ketchum, fans of the original game have a special place in their hearts for Red. Almost 20 years after the original game’s release, Red finally gets center stage in Pokemon Origins.

While some gamers might not be familiar with Red, they’ll see lots of familiar characters in Pokemon Origins. Professor Oak, Brock, Lance, Team Rocket Giovanni, Reina, and more will be in the show. The real stars, of course, are the Pokemon. While I’m quite fond of many Pokemon from the second generation and beyond, the originals are still my favorite. (In fact, one of my bathrooms is protected by a charmander and a charmeleon.) I’m really looking forward to seeing old-school Pokemon and the original characters from the game in Pokemon Origins.

The first episode is being released in Japan on October 2, 2013 to promote the Pokemon X and Pokemon Y games. The international release date for Pokemon Origins is November 15, 2013. It will be streamed through Nintendo’s Pokemon TV service.

Check out the Pokemon Origins trailer below and let me know what you think (please!). Are you excited for its release? Which original Pokemon starter is your favorite? Bulbasaur for the win!!!

X-Factor USA: You Better Ask Me to Dance

“You Better Ask Me to Dance” by Second Hand High is the best horrible song I’ve heard since the legendary “Pants on the Ground“. It contains several nuggets of lyrical wisdom like, “Why buy the cow when you can get the leche for free?” Performed last night on The X-Factor USA, the song whipped the crowd into a frenzy. The performance itself was total crap, but that made the power of “You Better Ask Me to Dance” all the more impressive. It’s a strangely catchy tune that got the crowd and judge Kelly Rowland dancing.

Check out the clip below to watch Second Hand High’s performance of “You Better Ask Me to Dance”. It’s followed by a sketch of The X-Factor USA judges performing to the song, including some rapping by Simon Cowell.

I was genuinely amazed by the song. It sticks in your head and makes you want to rap along. While Second Hand High might not have a future as performing artists, the guy that wrote the song might have some real talent. I’m fairly certain that some enterprising producer will make a highly polished version of “You Better Ask Me to Dance” or have some B-tier artists record it. I’m sure it will do reasonably well…and eclipse the power of “Pants on the Ground”.

Please check out the clip above and let me know what you think of “You Better Ask Me to Dance”. Do you think the song is legitimately catchy and entertaining? Or is it only satisfying in that William Hung train-reck way? Take the “You Better Ask Me to Dance” challenge and watch the clip thrice. I guarantee that 92 percent of you will have it stuck in yours heads for a week. Can you stand up to the power of “You Better Ask Me to Dance”?

Jeri Ryan vs. Paul Semel

Here’s a classic interview with Jeri Ryan conducted by RPad.TV friend Paul Semel. Many of you remember Jeri Ryan from her days on Star Trek: Voyager, where she played the lovable Borg designated Seven of Nine. Trekkers adored her for her beautifully bulging eyes and beautifully bulging…other parts that were accentuated by a skintight costume. The interview was originally done in 1998 for the now-defunct Bikini magazine. Semel has interviewed many celebrities in the past and is best known from his days with Gene Simmons’ Tongue magazine (had to be done Paul).

In the interview, Jeri Ryan discusses her infamous costume, how she almost didn’t pursue the Seven of Nine role, getting comfortable with her body, and more. Here are some out-of-context quotes:

Now I have to warn you, if we get into the sex questions I may dodge you, ’cause I have a son.

There’s a corset that goes under that thing, because you can’t wear conventional undergarments or they would show because the fabric is so skin tight.

The human body has two breasts, obviously. And you don’t want the uni-breast look. So that was one of the concerns when they were designing the costume.

Who wants to actually walk around looking like you’re wearing skin? ’Cause I’m not quite that enormously comfortable with my body. Or I wasn’t at the time. I’ve gotten substantially less self-conscious in the last year and a half, let me tell you. But yeah, you sort of look at it and go, “Kiss cheesecake goodbye, kiss hamburgers goodbye….”

I was very ambivalent about taking this role. I didn’t want to read for it originally, I had no interest in it. I didn’t know much about Star Trek, so I didn’t know what the writing was going to be like.

Be sure to check out PaulSemel.com for the full Jeri Ryan interview.

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Dark Knight Legacy: Nightwing and Red Hood Fan Film

Dark Knight Legacy is an Indiegogo fan film that takes place after The Dark Knight Rises. The trailer, embedded below, features several characters from the Batman comics and movies — Nightwing (TDKR’s John Blake), Red Hood (identity unknown), Stephanie Brown (Spoiler), Oswald Cobblebot (Penguin), and Lynx (from the Robin comics). For a fan film, the trailer is pretty good. I was especially impressed by the costumes.

Dark Knight Legacy’s goal is $30,000 with a stretch goal of $90,000. Rewards include a digital download of the movie ($15), your face drawn in the style of one of the characters on a comic-book cover ($150), and a Red Hood replica mask ($5,000).

Here’s an excerpt from the Indiegogo pitch:

Dark Knight Legacy follows “Robin” John Blake’s heroic journey to protect the symbol of Batman from the lethal, relentless attacks of a masked vigilante known only as the Red Hood.

A completely fan funded series, Dark Knight Legacy is a series by fans for fans. Every penny will be put towards creating an epic masterpiece that explores the world left behind in The Dark Knight Rises.

While I enjoyed the trailer, I’m split about Dark Knight Legacy. Nightwing is my favorite comic-book character and Red Hood is up there too. As a fanboy, I hate seeing “‘Robin’ John Blake” as Nightwing. Nightwing is Dick Grayson (the first Robin) to me and always will be. Since Christopher Nolan’s movies didn’t have any Robins, I’m curious to see how the writers of Dark Knight Legacy will handle Red Hood. While the character started as one of the Joker’s aliases, in recent years Red Hood has been (awesomely) redefined by Jason Todd (the second Robin). And yes, I realize these issues are very fanboy specific.

All that said, I’d like to see Dark Knight Legacy get funded. The trailer is a great tease and shows potential. I also hope the producers see fit to have a flashback sequence featuring Bane’s nutritional advice and rapping.

Kindly check out the trailer below and let me know what you think of Dark Knight Legacy.

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Random Thoughts on The Newsroom Season 2, Episode 9

The Newsroom finale (seasons 2) wrapped up one season’s worth of intrigue and two seasons of romance in a single, neatly wrapped episode. Couples were joined, bold executive decisions were made, bad haircuts were explained, and more. In some ways, The Newsroom finale felt like it could wrap up the show for good. While HBO has publicly stated that it would like to have a third season, it hasn’t confirmed that it’s in the works and writer Aaron Sorkin’s schedule is packed. While I expect and hope the show will return, it’s possible that the season 2 Newsroom finale will be it for the Atlantis Cable News crew. *sniff*

Juggling Jim: The biggest problem I had with The Newsroom finale (and this season) was Jim Harper. The thoughtful and sensitive senior producer sports a bad haircut…and get all the ladies. He patched things up with Maggie (his object of desire in s1), reconciled with Lisa (his s1 consolation prize), managed to get Maggie and Lisa to make up with each other, and solidified his relationship with his current girlfriend (Meryl Streep’s daughter). Jim’s successful social maneuverings in The Newsroom finale send a poor message to impressionable young males. It’s as dangerous as the “Disney Princess” syndrome. PSA: You can’t be successful at work, sensitive, thoughtful, and have a bad haircut AND get the girl. The real world doesn’t work that way kids. Also, why didn’t anyone drop sarin gas on Jim?!? That would have ruled.

Will Scores: ACN star anchor Will McAvoy came to the slow (six-year) realization that he was being a dick to his lifelong love McKenzie Morgan McHale. It seemed totally contrived that he finally figured it out now. It would have been more realistic if he tried to forgive and forget years ago or if he never let go of his anger for the rest of his life. Still, his awkward proposal was very sweet and it was nice to see Mc and Mac finally together in The Newsroom finale. At least it wasn’t as excruciating as Ross and Rachel on Friends. Also, the name McKenzie Morgan McHale MacAvoy is awesome. Quadruple M vs. Triple H at WrestleMania XXX?!?

Don Scores: “What I have can’t be taught,” said Don Keefer, cementing his status as the coolest cat in the ACN newsroom. It seemed likely that Don was behind the Sloan Sabbith mystery bid. The Newsroom finale revealed his scheme. The sly fellow keenly knew that he’d have to be crafty and sweet in order to compete with the financial geniuses and NY Giants that woo Sloan. His gambit paid off, with Sloan (played by the dreadful Olivia Munn) signing her book, grabbing him for a kiss, and slapping the book in his chest. Score.

Don also showed that he has evolved from the skillful-but-shallow ratings-first producer he was in s1 and is fully invested in ACN’s mission to be MSNBC’s sardonic cousin. It was cool seeing ACN president Charlie Skinner smile at Don in the opening scene, like a proud father happy with what his son has become…or Emperor Palpatine looking satisfied with his machinations. Passionate Don made a brief cameo, telling ACN lawyer Rebecca Halliday about his desire to do the news with his ACN family. Dick Don showed up in the same scene, detailing his plan to countersue the vile ~~Brian Fantana~~ Jerry Dantana.

Leona’s So High, High Above Me: I adore Atlantis World Media CEO Leona Lansing. Jane Fonda plays her with delightful aggression as a powerful and commanding executive. I don’t enjoy high-as-a-kite Leona Lansing as much, but it’s close; high Leona is hilarious and I’d love to hang out with her. While Charlie was talking to her about a serious matter, Leona’s cannabis-fueled aside of, “Do you want to split a pizza?” killed me.

Honorable Reese: Leona’s son, AWM president Reese Lansing, finally got on the same page as the rest of the gang in The Newsroom finale…and his honorable intentions were brushed aside. I felt bad for him. He should have been commended for coming around and doing the “honorable thing” that was bad for business. Instead, Charlie continued to treat him like a bitch. I’m not sure what the writers intended, but The Newsroom finale made the show’s villain sympathetic. Oh well, at least he gets to date a third-generation Rockette.

Maggie Clicks Her Mouse: Maggie finally explained her bad haircut to Jim, something that the audience understood for weeks. She also opened up about what was fueling her snooty behavior. She has a tender moment with Jim about how he got her attention by clicking his mouse (not a euphemism for masturbation). While I loved most of how The Newsroom finale ended, having it close with Maggie clicking her mouse (still not a euphemism for masturbation) was too cheesy for me. While I normally love saccharine and cheesy moments on television, my disdain for this character slightly tarnished the show’s ending.

Sabbith Seeds: I’m hoping that The Newsroom finale will lead to Sloan Sabbith’s heel turn. When Will gave his chair to Elliot for a segment, Sloan looked perturbed. Perhaps she felt snubbed that Will picked Elliot over her (never mind that Elliot is a far more experienced host). Throughout the newscast, Sloan was cut off by election calls. I’m hoping that this will lead to Sloan feeling like she deserves a bigger role at ACN and getting upset that she’s not a bigger star. Olivia Munn would be awesome in this role — talent that thinks she’s way more important than she actually is. If this comes to pass, Munn will surely win several Golden Globe and CableACE Awards for her accurate portrayal of a self-absorbed television host.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson to Star in The Fall Guy

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson confirmed via Twitter that he’ll be starring in The Fall Guy. The movie, which will be directed by McG, is an updated version of the popular ’80s action series. For those of you not familiar with The Fall Guy, the show was about a stuntman that moonlighted as a bounty hunter to make ends meet. The “unknown stuntman’s” adventures were filled with stunt-acular action. The original show starred Lee Majors. It will be fun to see if The Most Electrifying Man in All of Entertainment will be able to fill the shoes of the Six-Million Dollar Man.

Another reason for the show’s popularity was its leading lady: Heather Thomas. In the ’80s, she was pretty much the hottest woman alive. The vast majority of my friends had Heather Thomas posters on their walls back in the day and many of them watched The Fall Guy because of her. And yes, The Fall Guy news is a fantastic excuse to post a vintage Heather Thomas photo.

Now back to The Rock. This role is perfect for him. It takes full advantage of his physicality, pro-wrestling training, and comedic timing. McG’s Charlie’s Angels movies were great at blending action and comedy; The Rock is awesome at combining the two, making this a great pairing. It’s easy to see The Rock running, jumping, punching, kicking, and cracking jokes for 90 minutes in The Fall Guy, stylishly directed by McG. Hopefully the script is decent.

On a side note, many of you know that RPad.TV pal Justin Leeper is an actor and stuntman. He’s a pretty cool guy, but he’d even cooler if he pursued a part-time career in bounty hunting. I think you should all join me in encouraging Justin to become a real-life version of The Fall Guy.

Anyway, what do you think of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson starring in The Fall Guy. How many of you are too young to remember the show (don’t answer that, as it will only depress me). Who would you pick to reprise Heather Thomas’ role?

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Random Thoughts on The Newsroom Season 2, Episode 8

Last night’s episode of The Newsroom was vintage Aaron Sorkin (read that sentence as if WWE Michael Cole said it). The tension at the ACN newsroom was palpable. It was election night, which is like the Super Bowl, the World Series, or the Electronic Entertainment Expo for newsies. The Operation Genoa lawsuits (yes, multiple) added even more tension. Sprinkle in the traditional Sorkin ingredients of ill-timed humor, romantic squabbling, and neurotic obsessions over inconsequential matters then The Newsroom episode 8 delivered what Sorkin fans love and Sorkin detractors hate.

Charlie Rules: Sam Waterston owned this episode as ACN News president Charlie Skinner. His gruff humor (often fueled by whiskey) was outstanding. Prior to the election newscast, he gave a pep talk that was straight out of a football movie. He had a wonderful confrontation with ACN anchor Will Will McAvoy and company lawyer Rebecca Halliday; it ended with Charlie chiding Will for smoking, taking Will’s cigarette, and puffing on it as he walked out the door. (He also spoke in plot summaries, which is awfully convenient for people that have missed a few episodes of The Newsroom). His confrontation with Atlantis World Media president Reese Lansing was another great moment. This was Charlie’s best episode of the season and his scenes rocked.

Shiny Happy Will: With the biggest broadcast of the year happening and scandalous lawsuits landing the next day, Will appointed himself in charge of the ACN newsroom’s moral. Charlie thought it was sad that “the most miserable man in the building” took the task. Sloan and Elliot were unnerved by Will’s cheerful cry of, “Are you ready to have some fun?!?” Still, not all was bright in Will’s world. His lifelong love/object of hate MacKenzie McHale desperately wants him to fire her. She even went so far as accusing Will of not firing her to protect his image, which led to the awesome line of, “How big of a dick do you think I am and how long have you thought it?!?” The episode ended with Will firing Mac and asking a panelist to skewer him on air. Dum dum dum!!! (Just a guess, but perhaps Mac is pushing Will’s buttons so that she can be the Genoa martyr.)

Reese is Not Gay: My favorite scene of this episode was Atlantis World Media president Reese Lansing’s tangental monologue about his conversation with his mother. It started with Reese recounting his request for his mom to reconsider not accepting the resignations of Charlie, Will, Mac, and the rest of the newsroom. It segued into Leona Lansing (as told by Reese) asking her son for grandchildren, questioning if he’s gay, and arguing Reese’s claim that he hasn’t found the right woman. While Charlie’s scenes dominated and made this episode, this little gem of a scene was delightful.

The Seinfeld Newsroom: When things get tough, people often try to distract themselves from dire situations by focusing on trivial pursuits. Sloan Sabbith — played by the trivial Olivia Munn — was obsessed with solving the mystery of an auctioned book that contained her forged signature. Mac was frustrated by her attempt to change an error on her Wikipedia page; she was hung up that Wikipedia listed her college as Oxford instead of Cambridge. In both cases, the ladies relied on the only man in the newsroom that could solve their problems….

Slumdog Tech Savior: Of course Neal Sampat was enlisted to fix the problems. The ACN newsroom would fall apart without Slumdog Millionaire! He diligently and dutifully worked on the cases. He even got Mac to apologize for England’s colonization of India. I’ve long suspected that Mac’s sometimes unfair treatment of Neal stemmed from said colonization. It’s probably coded into her DNA…and reminds me of how I always suspect any white person from South Africa of supporting apartheid. Anyway, Slumdog Millionaire is still awesome and adds a much-needed dose of “Brown Power!!!” to The Newsroom.

Don’s Doldrums: The coolest cat in the newsroom (and The Newsroom) had some funny one-liners. I love his rapport with host Elliot Hirsch. They’re like a pair of brothers that love and hate each other. Sadly, Don found out that ~~Brian Fantana~~ Jerry Dantana is filing a separate suit for $20-million. In a Machiavellian move, Dantana used Don as a reference for a job at Kickstarter. He counted on Don blasting him and, of course, that’s exactly what happened. In addition to telling the Kickstarter hiring manager about Dantana’s colossal failure, Don also called Jerry a sociopath, which apparently counts as tortious interference in New York.

Snarky Maggie: I’m not sure what’s going on with Maggie. Losing the men in her life, losing her best friend, and having a young African child die on her back has…caused her to become a snarky bitch with a bad haircut. In the teasers for season two, it was revealed that Maggie would lose everything and suffer a complete breakdown. That hasn’t happened yet. Instead, the adorably hapless Maggie has been replaced by an unlikable wench.

Liquid Sex: Marcia Gay Harden’s character, the aforementioned lawyer Rebecca Halliday, declared herself liquid sex. It made my cougar meter redline.