Category: Sports

EA’s Tiger Woods’ Sim Adultery 2011

With Tiger Woods’ endorsement deals in a precarious state of flux — Gatorade has already dropped a Tiger-branded beverage, while Pepsi, Gillette, Tag Heuer, and others are considering dropping the star golfer — I think EA Sports ought to be proactive and flat-out humiliate him. It would be the ultimate cash grab that would satisfy analysts and shareholders that are only interested in the company’s short-term future. Since EA has been getting dinged for taking risks and launching new IPs for the last two years, it might as well try cashing in on one of its star’s woes, right?

Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10

I can see it now…Tiger Woods’ Sim Adultery 2011!!! The game would obviously star Tiger, but the tone would be similar to a Leisure Suit Larry game. To keep development costs down, it would use The Sims engine and existing art assets (mostly female character models). The goal of the game would be to sleep with as many women as possible (the 18 holes) while avoiding the media, car crashes, and hot Swedish wives. Bold players would be careless with their trysts, texting sweet little nothings to their loved ones without bothering to delete the messages. Advanced players would pay an army of minions to cover their tracks (paying for hotel rooms for afternoon delight, sending text messages on your behalf, whisking you away when your wife attacks you with a nine-iron, etc.)

EA could make this game in months and cash in on all this “Tigergate” nonsense. Maybe then it could get shortsighted analysts and shareholders off its back, allowing its developers to work on original and high-quality games.

Random Rants: The Four Biggest Problems with Boxing

Saturday’s fight between Paul Williams and Sergio Martinez was one of 2009’s best. It was a highly competitive scrap between two amazingly skilled pugilists. I scored the bout 115-113 for Martinez, but there were enough close rounds that I could easily see a close decision going to Williams. I had no problems with Lynne Carter scoring it 115-113 for Williams and Julie Lederman scoring the fight a 114-114 draw. The third official judge, Pierre Benoist, scored the fight 119-110 for Williams — that’s just some pathetic scoring right there. According to Benoist, Martinez only won one round the entire fight, which is laughable to anyone that actually saw the contest. While the overall scoring wasn’t as bad as Ali Funeka getting jobbed out of a title the previous Saturday, Benoist’s scorecard illustrates one of boxing’s biggest problems. Let’s take a look a the four major reasons boxing isn’t as prominent as it was in the ’70s and ’80s.

Three Blind Mice

1) Inept and/or Corrupt Judges — Boxing is one of the few sports where an athlete can put on a superior performance and lose. Using the recent Ali Funeka vs. Joan Guzman fight as an example, it was pretty clear that Funeka beat the crap out of Guzman for 75 percent of the fight. For some reason, the bout was scored a majority draw. Fights like that are such a turnoff to fans. Why would you want to watch someone put forth the effort of a lifetime only to have it decimated by three blind judges? Sadly, this is probably the least of boxing’s problems.

2) Sanctioning Bodies — The WBC, WBA, WBO, and IBF are generally recognized as the four major sanctioning bodies in boxing. Each group has its own champion and rankings. For the most part, each organization sucks. All too often these groups post questionable rankings and declare unworthy mandatory contenders for their champions. Sometimes they’ll create “super” champions, recognizing a title holder that has also won a belt from another group; this means that a weight division can have two champions — a “super” champion and a regular champion. Ultimately, it’s just a lame ploy to extract more sanctioning fees from more boxers.

Adding even more confusion is that fact that many people recognize Ring Magazine’s champions as the legitimate ones. So yeah, the sanctioning bodies or so inept and corrupt that a magazine has to sort through the muck to tell the people which boxers are really the best. That’s more than a bit ridiculous…but wait, there’s more!

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Coffee Talk #39: Gamer Girl Hot

Welcome to Coffee Talk! Let’s start off the day by discussing whatever is on your (nerd chic) mind. Every morning I’ll kick off a discussion and I’m counting on you to participate in it. If you’re not feelin’ my topic, feel free to start a chat with your fellow readers and see where it takes you. Whether you’re talking about videogames, whether the New Jersey Nets will go 0-for-December, Tiger Woods’ adventures in adultery, or whether Nokia can make Symbian competitive, Coffee Talk is the place to do it.

Erin AndrewsThere are certain things a woman can do that make her 20 to 30 percent more attractive than she already is. Female sportscasters are a great example of this. A cute female sportscaster will automatically be promoted to beautiful. A beautiful one elevated to goddess. (See ESPN’s Erin Andrews.) It’s called being “sportscaster hot”.

Female gamers benefit from this “gamer girl hot” phenomenon too. Is it shallow? Maybe…but I am of the opinion that elevating gamer girls is a good thing. On a practical level, it’s a common interest. For the sake of changing the image of what a gamer is, it’s fantastic to show that there are hardcore gamer women out there. In my mind, any woman that’s an avid gamer should be considered attractive because she has an awesome hobby.

Ginger Reyes

My big weakness is female bass players. I had a huge crush on D’arcy Wretzky for years — she was definitely a cutie, but playing bass made her sexy. Ginger Reyes is another beautiful woman that’s too-hot-to-walk-the-Earth because she plays bass. Paz Lenchantin is either my dream girl or too much woman for my brain to process — she plays bass and videogames!

Are there any sportscasters, gamers, bass players, actresses, or singers that you find more attractive because of what they do? Please list any gals or guys that pop in your head.

Tennis Pro Andy Murray Loses Girlfriend Over Modern Warfare 2

Andy Murray

The word on the street is that Kim Sears broke up with professional tennis player Andy Murray over his habitual videogame play. The Telegraph reported:

Andy Murray’s relationship with his girlfriend Kim Sears allegedly ended because of the British number one’s passion for computer games including Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2.

Brad Gilbert, Murray’s former coach, has said in the past that Murray spends “seven hours a day” playing video games.

The source told The Sun: “He would spend all his time glued to them. In the end she just got fed up with it. She wanted more out of the relationship.”

I’m kind of split on the matter. Being a top-ranked tennis-pro means millions of dollars, seeing the world, and hot women throwing themselves at you on a nightly basis. If I were Murray’s age (22) and had that kind of money, I’d be the whore of Babylon. Then again, I love games and have (unfairly) brushed girls aside so that I could sink more hours into an RPG. Murray either needs to slut it up or find a good woman that understands the importance of gaming.

Source

Raymond’s Random Rants

– Last night’s fight between Ali Funeka and Joan Guzman was fantastic…until the decision was announced. While Guzman boxed excellently for two and a half rounds, Funeka pretty much dominated the rest of the fight. Inexplicably, two of the judges scored the fight a draw. This was the worst decision I’ve seen in 2009, by far. It’s sad that Funeka traveled all the way from South Africa to America to get jobbed. Whether the judges were inept or corrupt, bad decisions are way too common in boxing and one of the big reasons the sport is no longer as popular as it was.

Blackest Night

– I picked up the two Sinestro Corps War trade paperbacks for my first September Tokyo trip. They totally got me back into Green Lantern. While they weren’t quite as good as the Sinestro Corps Wars, I enjoyed Rage of the Red Lanterns and Agent Orange too. My expectations were low for Sins of the Star Sapphire, but I picked it up anyway so that I could get all the info leading up to Blackest Night. I was shocked (in a good way) by how graphic it was. There’s some really messed up sh*t in there! [Spoilers ahead!]

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Raymond’s Random Rants

– I watched my Star Trek Blu-ray last night. It’s such a great movie. Unfortunately, I missed it when it was still showing in theaters and only saw it in September on my way to Tokyo. I guess it doesn’t matter though, since I enjoyed the characterization and dialogue more than the special effects. It’s definitely one of my favorite movies of 2009, but I have to wonder how it plays to younger people that haven’t seen the old shows and movies.

Dolph Ziggler

– It’s such an interesting time in the WWE right now. Established headliners like Shawn Michaels, The Undertaker, and Triple H only have a few years left. This leaves the younger main-event players like Edge and Randy Orton waiting for some new dance partners. The WWE has been pushing The Miz, John Morrison, Dolph Ziggler, and Kofi Kingston successfully. Seamus and Drew McIntyre have been getting decent pushes as well. I’m especially high on Ziggler and Morrison. Do any of these guys stand out to you? Do you see any of them headlining WrestleMania in 2015?

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Krista Ranillo Uses Facebook to Discuss Manny Pacquiao Affair

Krista Ranillo

After defeating Miguel Cotto on Saturday, boxing great Manny Pacquiao returned to the Philippines with news of his affair with actress/model Krista Ranillo making almost a big a splash as his historic victory. Pacquiao is huge in the Philippines — I’m talkin’ Elvis huge — so an affair is a tremendous deal. What’s interesting is how social networking has played a part in the whole thing. Showbiz Gossips has reported that Ranillo broke her silence through Facebook:

In last night’s report in 24 Oras, GMA-7 reporter Nelson Canlas was able to talk to Krista Ranillo through Facebook chat. The actress is still in the US with her family and is set to go back to the country by the weekend. Krista revealed that she is aware of the negative issues about her rumored relationship with Manny Pacquiao.

Twitter is getting in on the action too. CNet Asia’s Joey Alarilla wrote about Twitter users sending messages with the hashtag “#teamjinkee”, in support of Manny’s wife, Jinkee Pacquiao. It’s just crazy how social networking services have changed the way we consume information, including 411 on adultery by superstar athletes…or would this be Adultery 2.0?

And yes, even though I’m genuinely interested in this story as a Filipino-American and a social networking junkie, I used the whole thing as an excuse to post a picture of a hot girl on my site. Hit the break for another picture of this sexy home wrecker.

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Five Factors in the Manny Pacquiao vs. Miguel Cotto Fight

Pacquiao vs Cotto

The most anticipated fight of 2009 is tomorrow: Manny Pacquiao vs. Miguel Cotto. It’s a compelling matchup between two of the most exciting fighters in the sport. Even though the odds makers are favoring Pacquiao to win the fight — some experts would say unreasonably so — there are several interesting factors that make this bout so interesting. Let’s take a look at some of them.

1) Can Pacquiao Deal with Cotto’s Power? — Manny has never dealt with a fighter as strong as Cotto. A weight drained and old Oscar De La Hoya doesn’t count. Although Cotto is short for a welterweight (147 pounds), he’s thick and strong. Compare that to Manny, who was fighting at 135 in the summer of 2008 and has had most of his success at 130. You have to figure that at some point in the fight, Miguel is going to get leather on Manny. Will he be able to deal with Cotto’s fierce body shots? What about the left hook to the head?

2) Can Cotto Deal with Pacquiao’s Speed? — It’s true that Miguel has taken on some crazy fast fighters in the past, like Zab Judah and Shane Mosley. He was able to neutralize their speed through a strong jab and smart boxing tactics. That said, the mercurial Judah is an idiot with no heart. As fantastic as Mosley is, he’s never used his speed intelligently at 147 and above. While Pacquiao isn’t the smartest fighter in the world, he excels at using his speed to get in, do some damage, and get out. If Cotto can nix Pacquiao’s speed — and that’s a huge “if” — it’s going to take several painful rounds to do it.

3) Will Joe Santiago’s Inexperience Hurt Cotto? — Cotto recently fired his longtime trainer, his uncle Evangelista Cotto. He named his nutritionist, Joe Santiago, head trainer. Pacquiao, on the other hand, has been working with the excellent Freddie Roach for years. Roach has claimed that Santiago’s inexperience is hurting Cotto, since the fighter doesn’t have anyone correcting his bad habits. Some say this is Roach engaging in gamesmanship, but I think it’s a valid point. Perhaps Santiago has been training Cotto poorly, but the bigger issue is whether Santiago can analyze the fight and help Cotto make adjustments. I’m not sure how effective he can be in that capacity.

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