Rappers insulting other rappers is a hip-hop staple. The “dis track” has been used to emasculate rivals, create controversy, and increase record sales. Normally, the insults are between rival hip-hop artists or crews. Jay-Z is the first artist that I know of that has used one of his tracks to insult a sports agent. As many of you know, Jay-Z recently created Roc Nation Sports and has started representing athletes. His clients include Robinson Cano of the New York Yankees and Kevin Durant of the Oklahoma City Thunder. In the song “Crown” from his upcoming album Magna Carta Holy Grail, Jay-Z has a line for renowned super agent Scott Boras:
Scott Boras, you over baby.
Robinson Cano, you coming with me.
Yeah, it’s not the hardest hitting dis ever recorded, but it funny that Jay-Z went after Boras in a track…though I’m not sure it was necessary. Jay-Z already stole Cano from Boras as a client. Did he really need to rub it in or reinforce the point? Furthermore, Boras has a long list of clients and is responsible for some of the richest contracts in sports. I don’t think he’ll be hurting for business any time soon. All he has to do is point to the ridiculous contracts he’s gotten for Alex Rodriguez and new clients will sign.
Anyway, I hope this becomes a trend. Hip-hop artists dissing suits is funny. I heard the Nelly has beef with one of his accountants. Hopefully a dis track is in order.
Starting July 17, 2013, ESPN.com will switching all of its articles to Facebook’s commenting system. The site previously used Facebook comments for some of its stories and an in-house system for the majority of its articles. With the new system, readers will be required to have a Facebook account if they want to comment on a story. I know that most of you RPadholics are sports fans and that most of you are on Facebook, so I’m curious to hear what you think about the change. I also know that at least one dear RPadholic (*cough* 1ceman *cough*) is a sports fan that’s averse to social media services. I wonder if this will be a problem (for him).
As for me, I’m looking forward to the change. While there are some great conversations to be had on ESPN.com, there are also a ton of idiots posting hateful and racist comments. One of the reasons web sites like Facebook’s commenting system is that there’s less anonymity; most people use their “real” Facebook account to post comments on web sites that use Facebook comments. Of course there are some people that set up fake Facebook identities so that they can post stupid comments on web sites that use Facebook’s commenting system…but I suppose if it means that much to them then they should get something for their efforts. *shrug*
Anyway, how do you feel about ESPN.com’s full-on switch to the Facebook commenting system? Is it a good move or a bad move? Are you more or less likely to comment on an ESPN.com article now that it uses Facebook comments?
Last week in the RPad.TV Google Hangout, RPadholic bsukenyan shocked a bunch of us by saying that he doesn’t believe that the NBA is softer than it was in the ’80s and ’90s, and that aside from hand checking, the rules are basically the same. His comments stopped my brain activity for a millisecond. In my mind, his claim was a step removed from saying, “You know what? I don’t believe that the atomic weight of cobalt is 58.9.” Here’s some of what he had to say:
The current game is not soft compared to ’80s/’90s NBA.
They didn’t play as close in man-to-man defense, and as far as fouls are concerned they really weren’t that much different than they are now.
Man-to-man is much tighter now than I’ve seen in any older games…more
Welcome to Coffee Talk! Let’s start off the day by discussing whatever is on your (nerd chic) mind. Every morning I’ll kick off a discussion and I’m counting on you to participate in it. If you’re not feelin’ my topic, feel free to start a chat with your fellow readers and see where it takes you. Whether you’re talking about videogames, discovering the joys of Farrah Abraham, finally unpacking your games (though not organizing them), or Adrien Broner being an unsportsmanlike punk, Coffee Talk is the place to do it.
Last week in the RPad.TV Google Hangout, RPadholic bsukenyan shocked a bunch of us by saying that he doesn’t believe that the NBA is softer than it was in the ’80s and ’90s, and that aside from hand checking, the rules are basically the same. His comments stopped my brain activity for a millisecond. In my mind, his claim was a step removed from saying, “You know what? I don’t believe that the atomic weight of cobalt is 58.9.” Here’s some of what he had to say:
The current game is not soft compared to ’80s/’90s NBA.
They didn’t play as close in man-to-man defense, and as far as fouls are concerned they really weren’t that much different than they are now.
Man-to-man is much tighter now than I’ve seen in any older games. They played so far away from each other.
I have not seen a game that shows a more physical game than average ones I’ve seen during the regular season of today’s era.
I suggested that this would make a fun Coffee Talk debate and bsukenyan agreed. So let’s do it! If you disagree with him, please counter his thoughts in a respectful way.
As for my opinion on the issue, I couldn’t disagree with him more. To me, the game was absolutely rougher and tougher back then. Hand checking, zone defense being illegal, and being able to deck a guy in the back court that has a clear path to the basket — the game was much more physical in the ’80s and ’90s. Hell, you could frickin’ punch a guy and stay in the game during the ’80s.
As for saying the rules haven’t changed much, let’s take a look at NBA.com:
1990-1991
Penalties for flagrant fouls increased such that an infraction is penalized by two free throw attempts and possession of the ball out-of-bounds. The offender may also be ejected if there is no apparent effort to play the ball and/or, in the official’s judgment, the contact was of such an excessive nature that an injury could have occurred. Ejected players will be automatically fined $250.
1993 Playoffs
Any player who throws a punch now immediately ejected from the game, suspended for at least one game, and fined an appropriate dollar amount. Any player throwing a punch that connects with another player will be ejected from the game, suspended for a minimum of one to five games, and fined an appropriate dollar amount. Teams will also be fined an amount equal to the total sum of their players’ fines. Any player leaving the bench area during a fight will be fined $2,500, up from $500, and that player’s team will be fined $5,000 for each of its players who leave the bench area.
1993-1994
“Five-point” flagrant foul rule implemented whereby if a player’s season total exceeds five points, he receives an automatic suspension following the game in which his point total exceeds five and for each additional flagrant foul committed during the season.
1994-1995
Any player who leaves the bench during a fight automatically suspended for a minimum of one game and fined a maximum of $20,000; in addition to losing 1/82nd of his salary for each game, he is suspended.
Any player who commits two flagrant fouls in one game will be ejected.
Hand-checking eliminated from the end line in the backcourt to the opposite foul line.
“Clear path” rule changed to include contact in the backcourt. If a defender, grabs a player when the player has a clear path to the basket on a breakaway, two foul shots will be awarded.
1997-1998
A defender will not be permitted to use his forearm to impede the progress of an offensive player who is facing the basket in the frontcourt.
The “no-charge area,” formerly a two-by-six foot box where an offensive foul is not called if contact is made with a secondary defensive player who has established a defensive position, will be expanded to the area consisting of a half circle with a four-foot radius measured from the middle of the goal.
2000-2001
No contact with either hands or forearms by defenders except in the frontcourt below the free throw line extended in which case the defender may use his forearm only.
Neither the offensive player nor the defender will be allowed to dislodge or displace a player who has legally obtained a position.
Defender may not use his forearm, shoulder, hip or hand to reroute or hold-up an offensive player going from point A to Point B or one who is attempting to come around a legal screen set by another offensive player.
Slowing or impeding the progress of the screener by grabbing, clutching, holding “chucking” or “wrapping up” is prohibited.
2001-2002
Illegal defense guidelines will be eliminated in their entirety.
A new defensive three-second rule will prohibit a defensive player from remaining in the lane for more than three consecutive seconds without closely guarding an offensive player.
2004-2005
New rules were introduced to curtail hand-checking, clarify blocking fouls and call defensive three seconds to open up the game.
A lot of the ’90s rule changes were a result of the Detroit Pistons and New York Knicks. While they were multifaceted teams, a lot of people remember them for their punishing defense that bordered on assault. In my head, the 2004-2005 rule changes were basically David Stern’s way of saying, “Okay Detroit, your defense is too good and other teams are copying it. It makes for a slow and boring game, and I can’t have that!”
Objectively, I don’t see how anyone can say that the NBA hasn’t gotten softer. Look at the rules. Players used to be able to do a lot more, physically. I’m not saying that today’s defense is bad. On the contrary, there are some wonderful defensive teams that execute fantastic defense through brilliant athleticism and smartly coached zone schemes. In the ’80s and ’90s, players generally weren’t as athletic as today’s players (nutrition and sports medicine have advanced a ton) and coaches didn’t have the benefit of zone defense. The luxury those teams were afforded was the liberal stretching of liberal rules (i.e. muggings).
Subjectively, look at some of the players back then. Enforcers like Bill Laimbeer, Rick Mahorn, Charles Oakley, and Anthony Mason (who mugged me in high school…I think) were lauded for their tough play. If those guys played under today’s rules, they would be kicked out of the league. Even the top stars played rougher back then. In a game between the Detroit Pistons and Utah Jazz, Isiah Thomas humiliated John Stockton to the tune of 44 points. The next time those two teams met, Karl Malone greeted Thomas with a bionic elbow that resulted in a cut that required 40 stitches. You can still see the scar on Zeke’s head.
That elbow resulted in a $10,000 fine and one-game suspension — one frickin’ game! If a superstar like LeBron James or Kevin Durant delivered an elbow like that, the fine would be much heavier and the suspension would be much longer. With that in mind, Malone had a history of delivering flying elbows to several (mostly smaller) players. And why not? The penalties were a slap on the wrist back then.
Anyway, in what’s possibly the longest Coffee Talk ever, my conclusions is that basketball in the ’80s and ’90s was undeniably tougher and more physical than today’s game. I’m not saying that it was better or that the modern game is less entertaining. Today’s NBA is simply softer than it used to be because the rules have changed.
What say you? Do you believe that the “legend” of ’80s and ’90s basketball toughness has been exaggerated? Or do you believe that the modern NBA is soft? Kindly share your thoughts in the comments section!
Congratulations to RPadholic and longtime Miami Heat season ticket holder 1ceman for his team’s 2012-2013 NBA Championship. While the level of play wasn’t as high as it was in game six, the drama and excitement were fantastic. There were many times when it looked like the Heat were going to run away with the game, but the Spurs kept fighting back and it was hotly contested up until the final minute. Here are some random thoughts on the final game of this NBA season, accompanied by some original photos from 1ceman.
It’s Good to Be King: LeBron James was fantastic last night. His jumper — particularly from three-point range — was deadly, he snagged some key rebounds, and he was the amazingly efficient player we marveled at for most of the season. While some will still question where he ranks among the all-time greats, few will question him being in the conversation. (This is the part where RPadholic bsukenyan writes a passionate argument about how the LeBron vs. Jordan argument is silly.)
Robin Returns: Dwyane Wade was surprisingly efficient and grabbed some monster rebounds too. Going into the game, people suggested that coach Spoelstra bench Wade so that James would have more space to work with and the Heat offense would flow better. Looking through the retroscope, that suggestion seems ridiculous.
Battier Killed It: To me, Battier was the difference maker. He saved his best game for last, going 6-for-8 from three-point range. After being mediocre or worse in the previous six games, Battier repeatedly stabbed daggers into the Spurs’ hearts. (I’m speaking metaphorically. Actual stabbings with actual daggers would have resulted in an arrest.)
Have You Seen These Boys?: For the second straight game, Danny Green and Gary Neal were awful. The pair shot a combined 3-for-19, going 2-for-9 on three-pointers. Given Tony Parker’s bad hamstring, the Spurs desperately needed a great performance from at least one of these players. Instead, they both delivered stinkers.
Scapegoats: The Twitterverse was all over Manu Ginobili in the fourth quarter, but the balding Argentinean had a very solid game until making some bad decisions at the very end. His final numbers were 18 points on 6-for-12 shooting, five assists, and three boards. Parker wasn’t very good, shooting 3-for-12 and dishing out four assists — poor numbers for a player some consider the best point guard in the league. In his defense, he has a bad wheel. Still, I wonder why he often gets a pass from sports journalists. Perhaps it’s his adorably squeaky voice…but that shouldn’t cancel out the negatives of him being French and sleeping with people’s wives. Oui? Non?
Leonard Part 6: It was fun watching Kawhi Leonard become a star on national television. The 21-year old appears to have a bright future. His defense and rebounding were great throughout the series, and his offense became a bigger and bigger part of the Spurs’ attack. I liked how coach Popovich had him bring up the ball every now and again in the first half. Part of it was out of necessity due to Parker’s bad leg, but part of it was a clever way to mix up looks. Instead of Parker and Ginobili bringing up the ball, it was surprising to see Leonard occasionally lead the attack. The Spurs should have a future all-star in Leonard. To borrow a phrase from Ghostbusters, he’s got the tools and he’s got the tallent. (This is the part where you say, “It’s Miller time!”)
Happy Gregg Popovich: Pop is generally regarded as a curmudgeon (though I personally think he’s deceptively hilarious) and a fierce competitor, so it was strange seeing him flash a genuine smile after his team lost the game. He looked happy to be part of a great series and warmly congratulated the Heat. I almost spit out my Coke Zero when I saw him give Dwyane Wade a kiss on the cheek.
The Future: It’s going to be interesting to watch how both teams do next year. The Eastern Conference was pretty terrible this year, but the Indiana Pacers are getting scary and Derek Rose will be back with the Chicago Bulls. Both teams gave the Heat hell in the playoffs. The Pacers were without Hermione Danny Granger; he could return in a key role or be traded for a complementary player that fits better. It’s amazing that the Bulls were able to push the Heat, given Rose’s absence and other injuries. If the Bulls could challenge the Heat with effort, moxie, and great coaching, imagine what they’ll be able to do with Rose in the mix? While James will still be at the height of his powers, Wade’s banged up body will be another year older, Bosh’s RuPaul act is getting better (not a good thing), Battier should be done (dude tortured himself guarding power forwards most of the season), and Chalmers…will hopefully get hit by a car (in a non-lethal way).
The Spurs were old going into the playoffs. For most of the season, Ginobili looked like a player that should retire. The good news is that Leonard appears ready to take Manu’s place among the Spurs’ “big three” and Parker should be great once his leg heals up. Duncan has been written off before, but always seems to put together a season that makes his critics look silly. The bad news is that a healthy Oklahoma City Thunder team should beat them and there are a number of teams that should get better through free agency. Dwight Howard going to the Los Angeles Clippers or Houston Rockets would change the landscape of the Western Conference dramatically.
Your Take: Now it’s your turn! Kindly share your thoughts on game seven of the NBA Finals, as well as where the Heat and Spurs go from here.
The sixth game of the 2013 NBA Finals was the best in the series. The level of play was crazy high, there were a ton of dramatic shots at the end of regulation, there were some key rebounds and blocks at the end of overtime, and it was a game to remember. Here are some random thoughts on this classic game, as well as a photo gallery from RPadholic 1ceman. As always, I want to hear your thoughts on the event that had many of us shouting, “I love this game!!!”
The Return of the King: For the first three quarters, LeBron James was in Duke James mode. He was playing better than 99 percent of the NBA, but not at a level that would make you think that he was among the best players ever. In Q4, it was as if he remembered that, “Hey, I’m the best player in the frickin’ league and one of the greatest of all time!” He went into King James mode and pretty much beat the Spurs by himself. It was a stellar performance, offensively and defensively. He seemed especially effective after Tim Duncan knocked his headband off. Speaking of which….
Duncan Turns Back the Clock…For Two Quarters: Wasn’t Timmy just breathtaking in the first half of the game? He wanted this one badly and left everything on the floor. Unfortunately, his game dropped in the third quarter and he looked gassed in the fourth quarter. These things happen when you’re a 37-year old man in professional sports. That first half though…man. He obliterated Bosh (and anyone else that dared to challenge him with their primitive skills) in the post and snatched up rebounds like a Dyson vacuum cleaner. It was an amazing effort from the player many writers have dubbed “The Best of His Generation,” but I wonder how much he’ll have left in game seven. Yes, he has the heart of a champion (which you’re never supposed to underestimate according to Rudy Tomjanovich), but did he use the last of his powers in game six?
Living Here in Allentown: Pat Riley looks like a genius for signing Ray Allen and Ray Allen looks like a genius for bailing on the Celtics, don’t you agree? His fantastic game five (two four-point plays!) was overshadowed by Danny Green’s ridiculous shooting and a loss (duh). Last night he showed exactly why the Heat wanted him and gave more ammo to those that call him the best pure shooter in the history of the NBA.
Mike Miller’s Shoe: I got a kick out of Miller hitting a three with only one shoe on. Too bad he’s not overly superstitious. I would have liked to have seen him play the rest of the game with one shoe.
Manu’s Turnovers: After a fantastic performance in game five, Ginobili had eight turnovers in game six. You can’t do that in the NBA Finals.
Dwyane Wade and Flow: It’s interesting that LeBron was able to go into full eff-you mode while Wade was on the bench. It’s also interesting that the game tightened up in Q4 when he played again. Yes, he’s old and injured, but there are many times when he hinders the Heat’s flow.
The No-Call Conspiracy: Manu Ginobili was fouled towards the end of the game and it wasn’t called. Danny Green was fouled at the very end of the game and it wasn’t called. Conspiracy theorists believe that these no-calls were part of a David Stern mandate to ensure a game seven. Other people believe that the referees just sucked last night. Then again, Joey Crawford was part of the referee crew and he does have a shady history with Tim Duncan. Hmmmm….
Call It: In addition to your thoughts on the game, I want your pick for game seven. Will the Heat’s talent and home-court advantage win the day? Or will the Spurs’ system, poise, and experience win the 2013 NBA Championship? Shout it out in the comments section (please)!
After missing the last two games of the 2013 NBA Finals because of that E3 thingie, basketball has my full attention once more. Game five was a fantastic game to come back to. It was full of exciting runs, improbable performances, and Manu Ginobili’s glorious bald spot/receding hairline. Here are some random thoughts on last night’s game between the Miami Heat and the San Antonio Spurs. As always, I’d love hear what you thought about the game.
Manu Rises: After sucking for the first four games of the series, Ginobili errupted for 24 points, 10 assists, two rebounds, and a steal with a +/- of +19. He kicked things off with a three-pointer and it was all classic Manu from there. At times he was out of control and at other times he was glorious. He had several drives and shot attempts that had fans going, “No! No!! No!!!” just before the shot and, “Yes!!!” when it went in. Tim Duncan and Tony Parker had strong games too, but it was reemergence of Manu that made the difference. Well, that’s not entirely true. Danny Green had a monster night too.
Danny Green’s Night in Pictures: Green continued his torrid three-point shooting, going 6-for-10 from downtown. In the process, he broke Ray Allen’s record for three-pointers made in an NBA Finals series. It went something like this:
Next, Ray Allen’s face went like this (GIF by @cjzero):
Spurs fans around the world felt like this:
It was glorious.
Tony Parker’s Quiet Excellence: Aside from some bursts in the third quarter, I didn’t notice Tony Parker doing anything too noteworthy. His hamstring is obviously bothering him and he isn’t his usual 48-minute jitterbug self. Ginobili starting helped alleviate some of his ball-distribution responsibilities, allowing him to pick his spots to put the pedal to the metal. Still, I was shocked to see that he finished with 26 points on 10-for-14 shooting. It sure didn’t seem like it. It’s impressive when someone has a great game and you barely notice it. If Ginobili doesn’t start game six, I wonder if the added ball-handling pressure (*giggle*) will lower his efficiency, given his ailing wheel.
Duke James: 25 points, eight assists, and six rebounds would be a stellar playoff game for 99 percent of the league. For LeBron James, it’s not enough. After being monstrously efficient for most of the year, his 8-for-22 shooting was poor. He seemed too deferential. His first rebound came in the third quarter. His team needed him to go into eff-you mode, but he was determined to play unselfishly. We’ve seen him take over several playoff games this year and James needed to be in best-player-in-the-league form in Q4, but it just wasn’t there. Most all-time greats seem to have an on-off switch when it comes to raising their level of play. Was LeBron’s broken last night?
Chris Bosh: Dude had two strong playoff games in a row. Let’s go crazy!
Favorite Stat of the Night: Udonis Haslem played for nine minutes and had a +/- -20 for those nine minutes. That’s so bad it’s impressive…and also makes you wonder why Chris Andersen was glued to the bench.
Your Take: Now it’s your turn! Please let me know what you thought of last night’s game. Any predictions on game six? (And no, copying Mr. T’s prediction of, “Pain….” doesn’t count.) Will the Spurs wrap it up? Or is this series going to a game seven?
I totally missed the second game of the NBA Finals due to E3 2013 networking activities (i.e. drinking and eating)…in that order, but thankfully RPadholic 1ceman was on the scene! Below are some excellent photos that he snapped. From what I understand, the Spurs shot poorly and Mario Chalmers played out of his ass. Using Bill Simmons’ terms, Chalmers is one of the best “Irrational Confidence Guys” in the NBA, following a tradition established by Vernon Maxwell. For the majority of the year, Irrational Confidence Guys think that they’re the best player on the floor. On a handful of nights each year, it happens to be true. Apparently last night was one of those nights for ‘Rio.
When you have a chance, post your thoughts on game two of the NBA Finals (please!). Prop to 1ceman for his great photos!
Game one of the NBA Finals between the Miami Heat and San Antonio Spurs was fantastic. It had drama, beautifully executed basketball, and one of the silliest plays I’ve ever seen in a finals game. RPadholic 1ceman was on the scene and snapped some excellent photos that you can see in a gallery below. Naturally, I want your thoughts to the start of the NBA Finals. Let’s do this!
Tony Parker’s Shot: His shot at the end of the game was ridiculous. He dribbled around like a dick for 20 seconds, fell down, got up, and managed to hit an awkward bank shot with 0.1 seconds left on the clock. While that’s impressive on its own, LeBron James was draped all over him. Just…wow.
While I admire Parker’s game, I don’t trust him. He’s French and sleeps with married women. That said, the French thing, getting dumped by Eva Longoria for sending naughty text messages, and getting his eye damaged in the crossfire of the Team Chris Brown vs. Team Drake battle royal aren’t enough to negate how crazy that shot was. If the Spurs win this series, Parker’s “The Shot” will be replayed for decades to come. Even if they lose, it will get a fair amount of play.
Underrated stat that’s not getting enough play: Parker had 0 turnovers in the game.
Kawhi Leonard’s Hands: While LeBron James had a great game (18 points, 18 rebounds, 10 assists), he’s had more spectacular playoff games and the Heat really needed one of those spectacular performances last night. It’s not unusual to be loved by anyone for James to shoot over 50 percent, but last night he was under that mark and Kawhi Leonard was a big reason why. He played some nice defense on James, which is especially impressive considering that he’s only 21 and this is his first NBA Finals. His unusually large hands help his defensive game. Put on a pair of oven mitts and you’ll understand what it’s like to have Kawhi Leonard-sized hands. They remind me of Tom and Jerry cartoons when Jerry would cause Tom’s hand to get slammed by a door and it would comically balloon. Leonard’s paws are comically ballooned 24/7.
Fourth Quarter Woes: The game was really tight for the first three quarters. It was wonderfully executed basketball, with only a few breakdowns (most noticeably the Spurs’ transition defense). In the fourth quarter, the Spurs defense got a little bit better and the Heat tightened up just a bit. Miami made some poor decisions and sloppy plays that resulted in a bunch of Q4 turnovers. Miami had four turnovers through three quarters and four in Q4 alone. As amazing as Parker’s aforementioned shot was, it was the defense and turnovers that decided the game. It’s fascinating that it came down to subtle elevation by one team and subtle decline by the other.
[nggallery id=132]
Chris Bosh Sucking: Poor Bosh. He’s been getting slammed for his 2013 playoff run and his 6-for-16 game last night added fuel to the fire. I haven’t read much about Mario Chalmers’ 3-for-10 performance, but he gets a pass for not being one of the “Big Three” and getting paid a lot less. I’m a fan of Bosh; he’s one of the nerdier and more interesting players in the NBA. I’d like to see him do better. The upside of Bosh sucking is that it leads to a lot of dinosaur-related jokes on ESPN.com. Those crack me up.
Your Take: Now it’s your turn! Kindly leave your thoughts on game one and predictions on game two in the comments section.
According to ESPN, there’s an enormous performance-enhancing drug scandal set to explode. Roughly 20 players have been connected with a clinic called Biogenesis of America. Alex Rodriguez, Ryan Braun, Nelson Cruz, Gio Gonzales, Melky Cabrera, and Jhonny Peralta are some of the athletes that allegedly received PEDs from the clinic. Biogenesis founder Tony Bosch is reportedly assisting MLB in its investigation. According to the site, “Major League Baseball will seek to suspend about 20 players connected to the Miami-area clinic at the heart of an ongoing performance-enhancing drug scandal.”
As a lifelong baseball fan, I’m bummed by the news. While I know that a few of you feel that PEDs should be allowed in sports, there are many that don’t. Millions of fans feel that steroids, HGH, greenies, etc. ruin the purity of the game. No matter your stance, the scandal will be a black eye for baseball and cast a shadow over what has been accomplished in the sport for the last 20 years.
The one silver lining I see is the possibility Alex Rodriguez getting severely punished. I’ve never been a fan of A-Rod and wouldn’t mind seeing him slapped with a 100-game suspension. In a perfect world, he would also be found guilty of killing baby seals for leisure and burning down acres of rainforest for kicks; those crimes would justify the cancellation of his ridiculous contract.
On a random but related note, if I ever get rich, one of the first things I would do is commission a painting of myself as a centaur smashing a baseball bat into the head of an Alex Rodriguez centaur.
What do you think, sports fans? Do you think the Biogenesis scandal will be a huge deal? Or will it just be a blip on the radar? Will MLB get away with 100-game suspensions? Or is the players’ union too strong? Shout it out in the comments section (please)!
Former boxing heavyweight champion “Iron” Mike Tyson is headed to Adult Swim in Mike Tyson Mysteries. Armed with a magical tattoo and a pigeon, Tyson will be featured in weekly 15-minute episodes later this year. Here’s the official description from the press release:
Mike Tyson Mysteries — In the new animated comedy series Mike Tyson Mysteries, Mike Tyson is taking the fight from the boxing ring to the streets…by solving mysteries! Armed with a magical tattoo on his face and a trusty associate by his side — a talking pigeon — if you have a problem that needs solving, Iron Mike is in your corner. The series incorporates live-action appearances featuring Mighty Mike himself, and the gloves come off as the former heavyweight champ and his fowl-mouthed partner gear up for weekly adventures as they put unsolved mysteries — like how to defeat a super computer at chess or why a famous author/werewolf can’t finish his novel — down for the count. Animated quarter-hour from Warner Bros Animation.
This show sounds like all kinds of awesome. It places one of the biggest sports icons of the ’80s and ’90s in an animated adventure that pays homage to his trademark tattoo, love of pigeons, and Batman-like detective skills. While I’ve had some fun debates with RPadholics over Tyson’s place in boxing history, there’s no denying that he’s one of the most fascinating and interesting athletes the world has seen in the last 30 years. Mike Tyson Mysteries adds to his cult of personality and amazing reinvention.
Tyson started out as a fierce young heavyweight, went onto become a controversial boxer known for biting off ear pieces and making threats to eat opponents’ babies, and later cracked people up in The Hangover movies. And here he is in 2013, as a lovable mystery-solving cartoon character with a pigeon sidekick. Remarkable.
