While it wasn’t as epic (to me, anyway) as when Shawn Michaels appeared on ESPN Bill Simmons’ podcast, WWE Champion The Miz recently appeared on the show. It’s cool (and a little weird) when my worlds collide. As many of you know, I love WWE wrestling and Bill Simmons is my favorite sports columnist. When those two things come together, it’s better than a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup. Download the podcast when you have a moment and let me know what you think (please)!
It’s that time of the week again! Here’s some space to talk about the latest NFL football games and the impact they’ve had on your RPad.tv Rainbow Brite Memorial Fantasy Football Tournament teams. Have at it boys!
I’m so psyched for the Miami Heat vs. Cleveland Cavaliers NBA game tonight — the first time LeBron James will play against his old team since “The Decision“. It’s kind of like anticipating a car wreck or a natural disaster — you know something bad is going to happen.
The Cavs’ front has hired extra security for tonight’s game and claimed that it will confiscate anti-LeBron t-shirts (lame). The precautions will just add to what’s sure to be a charged arena. What do you think will happen? Will the fans give LeBron hell for all four quarters or will they calm down after the first five minutes of the game? Will LeBron do his famous powder toss? Will there be violence? Will people get arrested? Will an idiot make it to the floor in an attempt to tackle James? Will Sniper Wolf tag LeBron from the rafters?!? There are so many possibilities! What do you think will happen?
In an effort to prevent his daughter from becoming a fan of the Los Angeles Lakers, ESPN columnist Bill Simmons resorted to lying to his daughter…and the lies were frickin’ hilarious! From the evil Kobe Bryant to the dog-hating Phil Jackson to the vampiric Pau Gasol…Simmons showed why he’s the most entertaining columnist in sports. Check it out:
The big strategic play? Lying. Sorry, I had to. This was important. I convinced her that the Lakers were bullies (she hates the concept of bullying; it drives her crazy in movies), that Kobe is a mean daddy to his young daughters and that Phil Jackson absolutely hates golden retrievers. Did I show her the Artest melee on YouTube, then point out Artest in a Lakers uniform and tell her that she couldn’t root for the Lakers because Artest might run into the stands and punch me during a game? Yes. Yes I did. The only time I screwed up? When I tried to convince her that Pau Gasol was a vampire — that made her like him more. (F***ing Edward. He swayed an entire generation of girls under 15.) Everything else worked. Everything. I killed off every possible Lakers chromosome.
I was actually reading this in bed, trying to sleep. Laughing out loud at this column delayed my slumber for an hour. Bill Simmons rules!!!
New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter was allegedly offered a three-year contract worth $45-million. Allegedly, he wants more years and dollars. Is Derek Jeter — a 36-year old player on the decline — worth a giant contract?
Statistically speaking, he’s definitely not. He’s an old player that’s playing a young man’s position. His hitting production in 2010 was way down. Jeter has never been a great shortstop in terms of fielding. Despite winning a Gold Glove and having a high fielding percentage, he was one of the worst fielding shortstops in the league based on more advanced metrics. $45-million is a generous offer for a below average shortstop that’s old and most likely getting worse, but…
…he’s Derek Jeter. Is there an athlete in American professional sports that’s more synonymous with his team? Derek Jeter sells tickets, draws television ratings, and sells merchandise. This will be especially true in 2011 when he’ll become the first Yankee to reach 3,000 hits (barring injury). From a marketing standpoint, Jeter is definitely worth more money.
Then there are the intangible points that are impossible to place dollar signs on. Jeter has represented the Yankees in a uncannily classy way. He handles the NY press well and hasn’t made any major slip-ups off the field. Some people feel that Jeter helped the Yankees build the new stadium, increase ticket prices, and increase ratings for the YES Network. These people feel that the Yankees “owe” him a big payday. The dick fielding Jeter’s right — third baseman Alex Rodriguez — has an obscenely high and long contract. Unlike Jeter, A-Rod has embarrassed the Yankees on and off the field. Some people that Jeter deserves a contract comparable to Rodriguez’s. Personally, I think these sentiments are silly, but I also think it’s unfair to pay him solely based on performance since he clearly generates a ton of revenue.
Anyway, I’ve been thinking about this a lot for the last couple of weeks and I’d love to hear your thoughts. Kindly vote in today’s poll and chat it up in the comments section.
[poll id=”87″]
ESPN’s cameras caught Arizona Cardinals quarterback Derek Anderson laughing on the sidelines when his team was down 18 points on Monday Night Football. When questioned about the humorous sideline activities, Anderson got defensive, changed the subject, went ballistic, and eventually stormed off. It was awesome!
The interview totally reminded me of someone in an Internet forum being unable to defend a point; he/she changes the subject, gets angry, and eventually leaves the thread. It’s nice to see that dumb jocks can behave just like Internet geeks. Ha!
It’s that time of the week again! Here’s some space to talk about the latest NFL football games and the impact they’ve had on your RPad.tv Adam Lambert Invitational Fantasy Football Tournament teams. Have at it boys!
It’s that time of the week again! Here’s some space to talk about the latest NFL football games and the impact they’ve had on your RPad.tv My Little Pony Division I Fantasy Football Tournament teams. Have at it boys!
Let me get this straight — the Miami Heat spent hundreds of millions to sign LeBron James and Chris Bosh, as well as resign Dwyane Wade, and they can’t get people to show up to games?!? That’s hilarious! To combat the ambivalence and ennui permeating Miami, the Miami Sound Marketing Machine has released this commercial urging fans to “fan up!” The marketers hope that the spot will lead to fans attending the games — showing up on time and staying until the game is over.
ESPN The Magazine senior writer Tim Keown blasted Los Angeles Lakers guard Kobe Bryant for appearing in the commercial for Call of Duty: Black Ops. He preys on ignorant readers’ sympathies by weaving a tale of teen-aged boys killed by gun violence and ties it to Bryant appearing in a commercial for an M-rated game. Here’s a clip from this amazingly irresponsible article:
Seriously, is that really Kobe Bryant carrying an assault weapon with the word “MAMBA” on the barrel? Did Kobe Bryant, the highest-paid player in the NBA, take money not only to advertise a shooting game but actually shoot — or simulate shooting — an automatic weapon while doing it? None of his people, not his wife or his agent or someone in the NBA offices, advised him against this?
I love ESPN — the network, the web site, and the magazine — so I was incredibly disappointed by Keown’s piece-of-crap article. Keown is a fine writer, but it was totally bush league of him not to mention that the game is rated M by the ESRB. I don’t believe for a second that he (or his editors) didn’t know this.
As some of you know, I’ve hated Bryant ever since he waved off a Karl Malone pick in an all-star game. I can’t believe I’m defending the alleged rapist, but Keown’s attack is ignorant and irresponsible. Sadly, people will buy into because he leaves out details like the game’s ESRB rating and intended audience. Ugh.
